First, let me say this. I’m not in any way unhappy with our relationship. I love the helpfulness you’ve shown, bringing all of our cloud services into one place. I love how you changed my whole perspective on email with your innovative “conversations” method of email sorting. I love the fact that you follow me everywhere I go holding my virtual purse of documents and data, always ready to dig out whatever I need with a simple search query.
And the way you’ve brought my friends, associates, clients, and acquaintances together recently? I could just kiss you. Plus is the most wonderful thing you’ve done yet.
And yet, I have this nagging concern. You see, a few of my friends have mentioned that you can sometimes be fickle, capricious even. One of them even described how he was in a “til death do us part” relationship with you, and you callously dumped him and left him with nothing. I’m sure you can understand that even though I love you, with all my heart, there’s still a voice of reason (and several of my friends) warning me that I shouldn’t quite make the jump from lover to life long data mates. I take these kinds of commitments very seriously; hell, look how much I already trust you.
I want to accept, Google. I really do. I look in your eyes and I see a bright future together between us, sharing things with all our friends, bringing far off people close together in real time, and even creating little ones together. I’m ready for that kind of commitment, and I think you might just be the one.
Tell me you’re not going to up and dump me, and make me believe it.